Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Fantasizing QB

Sorry for the recent hiatus. I have no excuse (other than laziness). Let's hop on in to the fun, now...

I know I'm a little late to the party, but I would like to use this post to address Mr. Brett Favre...Farve...Favrve....

I'll just call him Bretty.

Oh, Bretty. What have you done? Sending pics of the little gunslinger is never a good idea. And we all know you did it. You wanna know how we know? Because you haven't denied doing it. This "I'm not going to discuss it" stance doesn't help you.

Now, I've never cheated on my wife. And, I've never sent pictures of my swizzle to anyone. So I can (with some certainty) say that if someone accused me of doing either (or both), my first reaction would be to profess immediately that I most certainly did not. That's how I know you did it. Innocent men don't calculate their responses.

Admit you did it. Take your lumps. I think a fitting punishment would be that you have to receive unsolicited penis pics on your phone for a year. And retire, too. I'm tired of hearing about you.

What really cheeses me is that this is just another case of a philandering athlete. And we, as America, really love the tabloidy BS of it all, but we don't realize we are becoming desensitized to how horrible this behavior is. Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Bretty... the list of unfaithful athletes grows and we don't seem to care. It's just part of the "culture of being a sports star".

Meanwhile, countless loving gay and lesbian couples (including some friends of the Wind) aren't allowed, under the law, to express their commitment in the form of marriage. The main excuse given is usually that it would undermine the sanctity of the institution of marriage. I don't see how homosexuals would undermine it anymore than some of my fellow heteros already have.

But, the Devil's Wind is not just a means of complaint, so I offer a solution. How about we allow homosexual marriage? Because people who love each other deserve that right, no matter their orientation. But, to preserve the sanctity of marriage, we disallow athlete marriage. They don't seem to understand how it's supposed to work, anyway.

Now, to hop back down from my soap box...

Who wants a fart joke?

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